Maybe?

I am so excited for tomorrow to happen that I'm making myself sick lol ... not really sick, just the nauseous, oh. my. god. this could really be happening kind of feeling you get when your WHOLE life could be changing forever. Tomorrow is the day that our bmom finally meets with our agency. She is already verbally committed to this adoption ... just hasn't had the chance yet to commit with organization that will make that happen yet. My friend from college will be going to the meeting and I am so ready to hear how it went. I'll be refreshing my email all day long waiting for the update I'm sure.

I talked with my friend earlier this evening about the subject of the bmom and us meeting each other. I know that our bmom wants to meet us ... so I was just trying to think of how that will happen. I know that we can meet through our agency but I feel comfortable meeting outside of our agency as well. There is a chance that we might meet up this weekend since it is a long weekend for me. I literally am shaking with excitement over the idea of finally meeting the woman who is giving me one of the greatest gifts I could ever ask for. She is giving me the piece of my heart that has been missing for so long. I am really excited about the chance of having some sort of relationship with her. We live 5-6 hours away from her, so a little road trip might be in the very near future. :0)

I got an email from a friend of ours tonight ... I had suggested that she look into using our agency and so she contacted them only to find out that they no longer are accepting applicants from outside of the area. They told her that she could use the agency that is located closer to where we live. ummm hi we haven't been with them for very long, so we just made the cut! Annnnd it just so happens that our bmom lives in Pensacola too. So crazy. So God. ah... chills.

On another note .... I also found out that there could be a possibility that the foster care agency that we are licenced with could potentially complete this adoption for us which would mean it would cost us nothing. Here's what processed through my brain when I first heard of this idea. FREE? = amazing. However, I absolutely, positively do not trust this organization with this adoption. It also would require us to work/trust a different county/workers we do not know with this precious gift. Something I am not willing to do. It would also mean that our bmom would not be able to get the counseling/support of an agency that I think she could benefit from. So, although I think that a free adoption would be incredibly amazing... it's just not something that I'm worried about. I don't want to lose another adoption because of money. I don't want to lose another adoption because I allowed fear or lack of faith in God providing to get in the way. This is what I learned about where I am at in this stage of our adoption. Money/affording this adoption is no longer a fear of mine. In fact ... I don't even think about it. I know without a doubt in my heart that God has had everything taken care of from day one ... and He's not going to all of a sudden dump us in the middle of it. So ... we are staying with our agency.

I got an email back from one of our grants again today. They were already reviewing it ... but with the updated information that I gave to them they wrote back and said that they would further review our application in February. So we continue to wait to hear back from them. I'm glad it wasn't an immediate "NO" like I have gotten back from the other grants. We are still hoping to get this golf tournament off the ground as well ... so along with everything else involved in this adoption journey we continue to wait.

So ... that's where we are with things at the moment. Hopefully I will have some more news to post tomorrow. :0)

Today I am choosing to be excited about new possibilities.